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Thinking Outside
The IVF Box
By Elizabeth Swire Falker
One of the hardest things about being infertile - at
least one of the hardest things I faced - was the
fear of failure. That is, I was terrified that I wouldn't
get pregnant and have a baby. I think many of us
face this fear, or one like it: what if infertility
treatment doesn't work for me? I know this is a
scary question! I chose not to consider it, and
instead buried my head in the sand and continued
with cycle after cycle after cycle of infertility
treatment. This is not always a good plan.
Sometimes it's really helpful to face the tough
questions; and not for the reasons you might think.
So, let me ask you: what if treatment doesn't work
for you? Or what if it might work but you're burning
out and can't face more needles, or you're running
out of money? You have many options for becoming
a parent (from donor egg or sperm to gestational
care, embryo donation and adoption, just to name a
few), and it's important to consider all of them, and
what it might be like if you chose not to have
children - if for no other reason than to take some of
the pressure off as you go through treatment.
Knowing that there's another choice or another path
to parenthood can liberate you from that fear of
failure!
I now realize that I might have been a lot happier if
I'd never tried IVF and instead started building my
family through adoption right from the beginning.
Adoption may have been my second choice (IVF
came first), but it was by no means my second best
choice. Adoption is right for me in a way that I
never realized or understood, in part because I didn't
consider it as a family building option until I was on
the edge of a nervous breakdown.
My last IVF cycle occurred while I was filling out my
adoption paperwork and I have to tell you, it was the
easiest, least stressful cycle I experienced (and I
went through four inseminations, six IVF cycles and
four miscarriages-talk about stress)! Knowing I had
a game plan and a strategy for what I was doing if
this cycle didn't result in a baby was huge step
forward for my mental health. I had finally given
myself some power back; I was in control of whether
I was going to become a parent. So if you're having
a rough day, explore some of the other options that
are available to you. One of them might bring that
baby home to you, or otherwise restore your sanity.
Elizabeth Swire Falker is the author of the bestselling
infertility title, The Infertility Survival Handbook:
everything you never thought you'd need to
know (Riverhead 2004) and discusses family
building options in Chapter Seven. Ms. Falker also
runs an infertility and adoption coaching service and
speaks regularly on these and other issues. You
can buy the book, contact her directly or find out
when she's next speaking by logging on to her
website at Survi
vingInfertility.com.
The Survival Handbook is currently being featured in our Mind Body Store ....
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Greetings!
This newsletter is designed to provide you with the
latest fertility news and research so that you can
make the most informed decisions. We carefully
select items that are of special interest for those
dealing with infertility issues and who want to know
more about Mind Body techniques. It is sincerely
hoped that this letter will be of great use to you.
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| Fertility Recipe |
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Zinc, which can be found in pumpkin seeds,
sunflower seeds, chicken, steak and oysters, can
help boost male and female fertility. Several studies
have shown that zinc deficiencies can impair both
male and female fertility.
Beef Stir Fry
3/4 pound beef fillet cut in strips;
1 tsp sugar;
2 tbsp of low sodium soy sauce;
1/4 pound mushrooms rinsed and sliced;
1/4 pound asparagus rinsed and chopped;
2 pounds of scallions chopped;
2 tbsp minced ginger;
2 tbsp minced garlic;
4 tbsp of sunflower oil;
1/2 cup of low sodium beef stock;
1 tbsp cornstarch;
Combine sugar and soy sauce and cover the beef
with this mixture. Combine scallions, ginger and garlic
in a small bowl. Heat a wok, then pour 1/4 of the
sunflower oil into the wok. Stir-fry half of the
scallion/ginger mixture with half of the beef. Cook for
45 seconds. Put meat on a separate plate. Wipe the
wok clean, then reheat the wok, add the rest of the
meat and cook for 45 seconds. Remove the meat and
place on a plate with the other beef. Add the rest of
the oil to the wok and stir-fry the mushrooms and
asparagus for about 45 seconds. Combine beef stock
and cornstarch and stir into wok with the mushrooms
and asparagus. Return all of the beef to the wok and
cook until sauce is thick enough to coat the beef and
vegetables.
-Maria Biasucci-Vianna, MS,
Nutritionist
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| Mind/Body Resources |
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InfertilityBlues.com is quickly becoming a National
Online Resource for Mind/Body infertility
information.
We would like your feedback
regarding our web-site as it recently has been
renovated. Does it contain the information that
interests you? Do you find it easily to find your way
around?
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Please contact us with your feedback today! |
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Is Fertility Yoga
the Silver Bullet? |
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When we struggle with our infertility issues, we often
look for that quick fix, that 'silver bullet'. Yoga may
not be the answer for everyone but it is becoming an
important part of the solution for a growing number
of women and couples experiencing infertility. Yoga
can empower us to embrace our issues but we have
to realize that it is a process. Within that process,
we have to be willing to change and to have some
discipline. My advice, don't just try it once, try it at
least several times.
Yoga can surprise us with what is possible on not
only a physical but a spiritual and emotional level as
well. Time on the yoga mat is an opportunity to
focus inward and to release and accept our
struggles. Yoga can teach us that we really can't
control the things that happen to us or the time it
takes for things to happen, but we can control how
we respond to it all. Through our practice, we can
learn to be respectful of time.
-Monica Morell,
PhD http://www.fertil
ityoga.com
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Learn about Monica's Fertility Yoga video ... |
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| Mind Body Store |
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After receiving many requests over the past few
years to recommend Mind Body books, relaxation
tapes, and videos, we decided to put together our
Mind Body Store.
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Visit the Mind Body Store... |
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